Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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