what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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