dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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