okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
