i think i have herpe
just one?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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