Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
