I wish I only lived at night.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Randomize
