so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Drake has all the answers
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
