some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
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