I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Randomize
