You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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