Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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