i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
