Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
