shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
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