dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
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Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
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Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..