Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just put wine in my tea
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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