They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
