Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
