then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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