He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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