I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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