Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Randomize
