How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
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Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
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Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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