And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
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