i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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