she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize
