420 ftw
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
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