I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
