Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
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