i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
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