I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Just pee around me
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
