The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
