just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize