i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
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Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
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I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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