i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
