Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
