I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
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