i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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