things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
My feet surprised me
Randomize
