Betty ford says i'm here all night
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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