hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
