haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
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