can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
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I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
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But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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