honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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