Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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