Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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