Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
