You made me cry and you don't even care
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
