It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
