I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
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