I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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