i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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